My ex-boyfriend and l had a son in 2004. We were never married. We split in 2006 and l am now married. My ex lives in the area with his girlfriend. My ex gets my son three days a week, M-W, it is a weekly schedule - never changes. l get my son the rest of the week, Th - Su. My ex pays for half of our son is daycare (he goes two days a week) and that is it. Our son is address is listed as mine, his insurance is through me, his contact for all of his doctor visits, etc - is me. The ex and l never went to court for anything, we just worked everything out amicably.

My ex is now telling me he does not think it is fair that l claim him for taxes every year and that l get the tax refund for it. l think he is being silly.

Who is right? Should be we trading years? Should l continue claiming his as l have ever since we split up? (He claimed him from 2004-2006, I've claimed him ever since.)

Thanks for any help.

It appears that you are the custodial parent and as such can claim the child or allow him to claim the child. It is totally up to you.

Helen, EA in PA

In ur situation, it seems fair to alternate years in claiming the child. That is generally what is ordered by the courts in such shared custody situations. If ur EX is not custodial parent or parent claiming dependency exemption, he cannot even get the credit for paying the child care costs (child & Dependent Credit). Letting Ex have his turn to claim the child does not mean u can not still get some benefits, due to the special rules for separated or divorced parents. Absent a court order or ur signing to permit ur Ex to claim the child, ur right would be superior to his as the child lives MORE with u than with him. But this may be one way to make it stay amicable, & seems fair with him paying child care. He is not being silly at all.

Edit: JSS is NOT right that u MUST claim the child. Either one of u could claim him as child is not providing more than half his support, & lives with both of you. If u two do not agree, then ur claim would be superior. tkarhrs is incorrect about the support rule.

Who ever has custody of the child for more than 6-months claims the child. If you have custody for 4 days in a week, you must claim the child unless you allow your ex to do so.
Read: http://taxipay.blogspot.com/2008/03/child-of-separated-or-divorced-parents.html

You have your son 4 days a week, your ex has him 3. Legally, unless you agree in writing to allow him to claim the child, you have the legal right to claim him.

Fair, of course, is a different issue than legal. But it sounds like you and your spouse are providing the bulk of the child is support, so your claiming him also sounds fair, besides being legal.

The rule is more than 50% of providing the child is needs.
Since you pay for housing, clothing, food, medical care, entertainment
You get the deduction. Your ex cannot provide proof to the IRS that he is covering more than 50% Do not give in.

The general rule, crudely stated, is that the in the absence of solid proof about who provided the most support, the parent who has possession of the body the most gets the write-off. If all the child is father pays for is half of daycare, he will be out of the running in any case.

You have a stronger claim since he lives with you more than with the father and pay more than half the support.

You can split the benefits. This would enable him to claim HOH and he would appreciate that.

Based on
1) Where the child spends more time, and
2) Who provides more support

you are entitled to claim the child and the ex is not.

If you wish to alternate years, you must sign a written agreement stating who will claim the child which years. Absent a written agreement to the contrary, the facts as you have summarized them indicate that you may claim the child every year and the ex may not claim the child any year.